Chapter 5
[EN]
"Bravery is a team sport" – Part 2
◼️Talking about Sao Tome on Chapter 4, made me revisit photos and memories of that period, and when comparing the island I got to know and love – with today’s version of it – there is a disparity in how people behaved before and after modern technology arrived.
In my time given that there wasn’t much to do in Sao Tome I would find ways to fill my days optimally, since my dad was working and my mom was accompanying him to the office. Sometimes I would wake up at 6 am so I could catch a family friend before he went to work and we would play tennis in a nearby hotel. Other times I would go diving in high seas with him or I would be at the régie learning from my dad and the people he worked with, who were kind enough to patiently explain how to operate Edius in the video editing room at RTP. But the main way I occupied my mind was by teaching myself how to play chords on a guitar and self-learned 平仮名 'Hiragana' as well as basic Japanese phrases, while watching pre-downloaded anime. The internet connection was lagging all the time, as the usual would consist of a 30-40 minutes wait (on a good day) in order to load an uninterrupted 5-minute clip on Youtube, so I found that pre-downloading tv shows and cartoons in Portugal pre-flight using 4G worked to my advantage. At that time, ‘torrents’ saved my life figuratively.
Doing quick math I come to the conclusion that I’ve spent more than half of my life living in foreign waters, as I’ve just turned 27. As a child I got to experience what life was like in the African continent, as a teenager I had the chance to go on an immersive adventure throughout the European, American and Asian continents, and now as a young adult I am currently settled down in the UK post-Brexit. I reckon Oceania is missing to complete my puzzle and I do have an interest in the New Zealand lifestyle, having worked there for a week and realising health is of utmost importance to the locals. It has piqued my interest as our priorities align so who knows what lies ahead.
Sometimes people aid our journey in the most unexpected ways. Yesterday I was reminded that although the good guys don’t always win, as doing what’s right doesn’t always bear fruit, consistent actions that come from the heart really do leave an indelible mark.
In my opinion, it is easier for a good guy to turn bad, than a bad guy to turn good. At the same time, whilst believing that people are inherently “evil”-natured, I follow the ‘good until proven otherwise’ proposition. I suppose it can be interpreted as “innocent until proven guilty”. Not that life is a court of any sort, but the gullibility that today’s age allows for tainted-heartedness to exist out in the open, makes me believe we do need some guidelines that unfortunately are not being taught at school nor at home. This is to say that it is definitely not impossible to accomplish, but the amount of work necessary with the view to achieve such a change is often too big to handle for most.
In action movies, it is not by chance that the character representing a good/kind nature/spirit is frequently the one who sacrifices himself for the greater good of the world (which sometimes results in dying believing in something bigger than oneself). So then, why should we be that person? Why should we choose to be good in a corrupt and naturally-greedy society?
Great question.
Why should you choose not to smoke when everyone around you does? Why should you care about your physical and mental wellbeing when it is seen as high-maintenance and pretentious? Why should you prioritise sleep when going out every night is way more fun? It’s the same principle. Have you ever stopped to notice that you are repeatedly faced with adversities when doing what’s right? I never said it was easy… And I don’t think it should be, because then we devalue our behaviour.
What does make a big difference, however, is the camaraderie. I got to experience to various degrees what that word means in different countries and cultures, and let me tell you, it was many a time the decisive factor that determined how long one can last in an unfamiliar place.
This week and for over a week I’ve been struggling with sudden loss of arm strength and tried almost everything in the book to recover at the speed of light, since I live by myself and need to get on with my daily tasks. My family has been keeping an eye for any unusual symptoms I may develop and my friends have been indefatigably doing their best to keep me company across time zones.
There are friendship bonds that stand the test of time, family bonds that have an eternal perseverance attached, and there are unspoken conversations with those who we share our personal space with. In my building I see people carrying heavy groceries all the time, or being disoriented and needing help but being too shy to ask. I am sure I am not the only one who noticed it; However, I seem to be the only one who actually does something to try and help without looking for anything in return. Which makes me sad. Is it because people are too busy and can’t time 5 minutes off of their schedule? I doubt it. It takes me 10 seconds to open the doors for someone when I observe that my fellow premise-sharer is having a hard time carrying 20 litres of water by himself. It’s pure disinterest in anyone but the self… that’s the conclusion I come to.
Yesterday I was coming home from a doctor’s appointment and the moment two neighbours of mine saw I was wearing an arm splint, their immediate reaction was to help me get home safe and wish me a fast recovery even though we had never talked before and they aren’t even fluent in English. They mentioned they’ve seen me around for the past year or so and seeing me go out of my way to help others has made them reflect on themselves, wanting to become better people. How lovely is that? 😊 Sometimes we don’t realise the impact we have on others, but humankind isn’t blind. So long as it comes from a genuine disposition, others can feel it and will resonate accordingly. Our interaction may have been quick and 'en passant', but it made me want to focus a tad more on my recovery as I felt how they were truly rooting for it too.
As humans, we become more daring once we feel supported; And we support those who make us feel seen. Happiness and wellbeing are passing notes in our daily symphony, but it is not determined by an absence of problems. A wise person advised me to define it as the ability to deal with and resolve them in a timely manner, and he couldn’t be more right.◻️
